Pearl,

We're worried sick about Fanny! Louise found this advertisement tucked under her dancing tights when she was straightening her sock drawer. It's all about cartilage! Pearl, isn't cartilage something that grows in the naked body? Where did a well brought up child like our own Fanny ever come in contact with such filth? Oh Melba! See what happens when a mother succumbs to the evils of spirits? I'm frantic, Dear. Please say all this will turn out happily. You are so wise about the world.

I Remain Your Devoted Miss Blue