Dear Cultured Pearl,

How felicitous that you mention The Elixir of Love. The harried fellow who examined Melba and Fanny called himself Dr. Dulcamara and seemed rather glib for a medical professional. Linguini recommended him. Linguini's love of the Italian repertoire is exceeded only by his fondness for Chianti. Good God, Pearl! Melba has decanted a dozen bottles of Dulcamara's prescription just since Wednesday! No wonder she's having nightmares about little red goblins! And she so recently returned from The Cure! Oh Pearl, you have saved the day with your astute and gently proffered observations. I shall put things right immediately!

Your Devoted Miss Blue