Dear Pearl,

I have checked our friend Melba into the Saints Alive Rest Home. It is run by the teetotalling Christian Brothers who will make certain she gets no alcohol whatsoever. They will serve her the ginger ale version of communion wine when necessary.  Her roommate is a most interesting fellow. He calls himself Father Time. The brothers are uncertain whether he is the genuine article or just a delusional old fellow. I'm inclined to think the former. A delusional old fellow wouldn't know the ins and outs of New Year's celebrations the world over as he does. Pearl, did you know that some cultures ring in the New Year with human sacrifice and lettuce hats? I didn't either! I hope Melba will be at Saints Alive through the month. It will be ever so interesting to see what happens in her room on New Year's Eve!

I Remain Your Devoted Miss Blue